Speaking my new favorite "love language"-Gift Giving

Not the only lonley

2010-08-14T16:54:00.000-07:00

I think most of you can agree that it seems easier to be "the leaver" than "the left"

A comment issue me and the hubby have occurs during port calls when i wish he would just stay home and talk to me on the phone but instead he wants to hang out with his friends (yes the same guys he just spent 45 days underwater with). I know he missed me but he never seemed lonley. I on other hand would be acutely aware of my lonliness when on a Friday night I found myself watching Notting Hills for the millionth times.

This geobacherlor thing is different. Even though everyone on his boat has moved to the same city, so did their families. He is one of the only few that didn't PCS (due to his time left on the boat). I was worried that this would seem like a big port call. He would have all the friends and all the fun and I would be at home alone. Most of my favorite wife friends left and I had taken a trip to pity city.

After a couple days i realize, hubby is just as lonely as I am. Hes living out of a hotel and his friends are spread out all over Norfolk. His friends have their families down there and he doesn't want to impose. For the first time Ive realized Im not the only lonely.

To cheer up my geobachelor up, I have asked him to take pictures of all the new places he is explorer. one by one I plan to "photoshop" a picture of me in and send them back. Hopefully this will make him feel like I am there. It'll be just like those cardboard cut out pics :) cant wait!

as my mama always says "you can visit pity city, but you can't move in"

tdWHY?

2010-08-10T19:04:00.000-07:00

I can be a bit dramatic. I admit it. But I have decided that geo-bachelor was a word/concept/condition invented just to piss me off. He is not deployed. Thank God. But he is "decom"ing the boat..and that means he ain't here either.

Pros (aka reasons why its better than a sub)
1 He doesnt have internet in the barracks but I am sure there is a starbucks with free wi-fi in a 10 mile radius.
2.He can send emails that arent screened and sent 3 weeks later AND he can send attachments
3. His phone works
4. He gets sun exposure (ignore the fact that its 100 degrees)

Cons (aka why i hate it)
1. He is miles and miles away (and also miles from an airport)
2. shift work. he has a phone so that he can call at odd hours
3. He just got home from a deployment where they left early and came back late. He just got home!
4. I am stuck here.
5. Most of the boat PCS'd (including my favorite wives) so i gotta make new friends.

For better or for worse, yesterday was our anniversary and to ease the pain of absence he bought and assembled my very own hammock! I am sad he wont be in it with me but atleast i can curl up with the cat and a good book.

He even treated me to dinner and got us more "cake topper" since he was deployed on our last anniversary. so thoughtful. I almost forgot he would be hitting the road today.

Ugh. just when i think i know how to handle this navy thing, they throw us something else.

Living apart sucks. gotta find a way to make tomorrow as awesome as yesterday!

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In #6

2010-07-30T07:24:00.000-07:00

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In #6

1. What is your spouse's best feature?
His smile, so boyishly cute

2. Mild, Medium or Hot Sauce?
A tasty of the spicy just to make sure its too hot then back to the mild

3. What is the worst uniform you had to wear for a job?
I worked at Buildabear Workshop and every so often had to dress up as "Bear-amy" Boy is it hot in there!

4. You have invisible powers... where is the first place you would go?
In my hubbys rack when hes on deployment :) Id leave him a not letting him know i was there

5. What's left on your "to do" lost for this summer?
Get my business going full steam ahead!

I have been a post-deployment enabler

2010-07-27T14:52:00.000-07:00

OK hubby, I get it. You're gone all the time SO you do not know where the recycling bins go or in todays case...how to update the pets records at the kennel, but you will learn or I will die trying to teach you :)

This morning I was delighted when the hubby remembered we needed to make reservations for our cat and dog at the kennel. I was ecstatic when he offered to help plan our little getaway by making sure the pets had a home. Boy, was i irritated when I had this convo at 8am over BBM...I had just gotten to work and...

Hubby: the kennel needs the cats updated rabies records

Me: ? (what did he want ME to do about it?)

Hubby: I know the cat is up-to-date, they just dont have the info

Me: OK, did you call the vet

.........minutes go by..............

Hubby: that was easy

Me: what? (I knew he was a big boy. I knew he would figure it out)

Hubby: I just called the vet and they faxed it over..originaly I was hoping you could just swing by on your way home. I have never done that before.

Now it is true that he has never done that before. He has also never driven a Ferrari but I bet he would figure it out...and FAST. Usually I take care of that sort of thing whether he is gone or not. I could have taken care of it today and saved everyone a head ache...but i didn't want to.

I am done emptying the dish washer simply because he does not know where the stoneware goes. No longer will I be the only one to figure out dinner, simply because I know what is in the fridge. I work as much as he does and its time he stop riding the post-deployment wave. Soon enough he will be gone again and I will have missed my opportunity for a break. I have a feeling my life will be marginally easier after that lil "teachable moment": )

Granny fights the big C

2010-07-25T15:31:00.000-07:00

My grandma got the call. that polyp that didnt seem like the others has proved to be far more unique than we had hoped. 4 were benign. the fifth is a tumor.

Normally you might think this is a sad post...but thats cuz you never met Grandma B. Shes no ordinary lady! I know shes scarED but shes also scarY so cancer beware. shes coming to kick your ass!

I had to come back to CT but I wanna be there for her SO today I am making her a care package like no other. The only other care packages I have made were for deployment...SO I am making a Chemo survival kit. I know she can beat the cancer but if you have ever worked in a cancer clinic (like I did the year after I graduated collect) you know that before the nausea and weight loss begins patients complain of another side effect. BOREDOM. Ever since Bob Barker left the Price Is Right, the clinic has not been the same. I mean imagine being hooked up to several ports with food you can barely taste simply awaiting the unpleasantries that are to come. I can't fight the physical but I can help with the mental.

SO whats in my Chemo Survival Kit?

1. IPOD touch
Not sure if Grandma B has ever seen a touch screen but shes a fairly quick study. This is no ordinary IPOD touch. I have downloaded some of her faves. first on the list Wheel of Fortune. We watched it together for years when I was a kid. Brain age- Its not just for Nintendo DDS anymore! The Price is Right for sure. Me Amo Bob Barker. Deal or No Deal and a few others to keep occupied.

I also uploaded some fun pictures of the two of us. One is from the year I worked as her "Student helper" in her adult ed class. I was 16 at the time so it made for some fun stories. Another is from my first flight. Grandma B took me on a trip to chicago. I am originally from MI so we couldve driven but she thought it would be cool. I will never forget it. The last are a few shots from my wedding. Grandma was glam-o-rous! Almost upstaged me since we look like clones.

2. Live strong bracelets for her and 10 of her closest friends. I will wear mine till she finishes chemo and then we will have a removal ceremoney at her 75th Bday party (a secret my mom I are planning)

3. A Snuggie so she can raise the roof. Just kidding. Chemo clinics are COLD and one side effect of chemo is it makes some people coldER. The Snuggy is blue (her fave) and has her name embroidered on it..

4. Finally it will all be sent in a recyclable tote bag. She has to be cute and ecofriendly when she shows up for her first day.

Live Strong Grandma B, Live Strong

C is for Community, Companion, Commitment, Counter attach, Connection, Compassion, Caring

Another Duty Day

2010-07-25T13:54:00.000-07:00

Still counting down to the beginning of our latest adventure...TDY and yet instead of spending quality time before his "big move" he has duty..

BUT I wont let that get me down. It is ME TIME.

Step 1: catch up on the TV shows he hates
I have watched 2 hours of teen mom, 3 dating shows, Kourtney & Khloe and season 2 of Gossip Girl ( i know im late)

Step 2: watch romantic comedies
I LOVE these movies...at the begining they make my life seem like a cake walk...is no one has ever cryogenically frozen my eggs with the wrong label and then impregnated me with the wrong child etc etc.

THEN at the end everyone lives happily ever after. Gotta love a happy ending!

Today I watched "timer" about a woman searching for love on the verge of her 30th birthday (hence the frozen eggs) and now I am watching some Jen Aniston flick. Its one of her better hair movies!

Step 3: Sew

Sewing is my newest hobby...more on that later. So far no humans or pets have been harmed in the process..:)

Many more days like this to come. Better get used to it.

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In #5

2010-07-23T08:59:00.000-07:00

(please feel free to use this!)

this is my first time doing this so here goes. Nice to meet you all!

1. Besides the horizontal mambo, what do you miss most when your spouse is deployed?
I miss cuddling up on the couch after a long day at work. I miss having a shoulder to cry on. The Navy seems to deploy him just before some devastating moment in my life. I also miss having someone who doesn't mind walking the dog in the snow :)

2. What do you miss least?
I don't know if this is a man thing but he is just so gassy. He belches in farts with pride. Its ridiculous. Also, he always has to chew on things, straws, toothpicks, plastic. I know he's from GA but sheesh!

3. You only get three crayons to finish your picture… which three do you choose and why?
Purple and Cerulean. Purple cuz its my favorite color. Cerulean, because it was the first "long word" i read by myself and saying it always make me feel smart :)

4. If you could have your own fragrance, what would it be called?
Spicy Juniper- Cuz i am sweet with a hint of sass.

5. If the shoes make the man (or woman), what do your shoes say about you right now?
My socks say im going down to the sub today. The firs time went down I wore flip flops and stubbed my toe on the ladder :) Nothing like duty dinner!

Seems like Deployment All over again :/

2010-07-19T07:23:00.000-07:00

Not your typical TDA.

Usually I try to post positive solutions to problems that arise during my ever-changing long distance relationship with my hubby. A card here, and unexected batch of home made cookies there..and usually we are back to (relatively) newly wedded bliss. BUT on this occassion I am out of solutions

My husband is a submariner who just got back from an extended deployment with few emails, limited phone calls, and lots of port calls to countries that block skype. FUN! now (5 months later) he and his boat are moving and I am not :/ About 30 wives are not moving because they anticipate them being gone for less than 1 year. NOT COOL NAVY. so once i came to terms with this new life plan, I set out to make the best of it. Since it feels like a deployment (sans FRG support, morale boosters, and general understanding from the ~70 wives that are moving, I decided to create my own "non-deployment separation plan" I am on step 1 and looking for suggestions :)

1. Take a "pre-deployment" vacation
(on a budget)

The hubby is in PNEO right now so we cant take time off. SO instead we took a couple weekend (mini) "pre-deployment" vacation. This was extra special since he hasn't had a weekend off in some time. Friday we attempted to go see inception but our lil town movie theater was sold out. never happens but happy they are getting business! SO instead we went to the beach to watch the sun set.

Saturday we met up with friends in boston. The weather was perfect and streets were bustling. It was nice to be out amongst the Masses. hehe. We even took a duck tour to get into the true tourist spirit. I highly recomend going on the last tour of the day. The sun hangs low in the sky and it is simply breathtaking. We even passed a wedding reception on the water (memories).

Our vacay didn't stop on Sunday! We took a lil trip up 95 and hopped on a fairy to block island, a cute New England vacation destination. We biked around and enjoyed the beauty of the water. Boy does my bum hurt!

If you are planning for budget over convenience note:
the Judith Point Ferry is $24 RT
the New Londay Ferry is $42 RT

The bike shop on the peir KEEP WALKING
The bike shop on water street $30/day
The bike shop one block behind water street $14/day

Any who, for step 2, I think will visit the hubby and try to make his barracks into something more "homey" i will keep you poted.

Hidden Message make for Meaningful Moments

2010-07-13T07:16:00.000-07:00

Sometimes the best gifts are the ones you work for. The suspense of wrapping paper and gently placed bows make the actual gift that much more exciting. A message on a puzzle can help build that suspense.

You can find message puzzles online or make one yourself making some simple supplies from your local craft store.

This is a great activity for kids as well as a romantic surprise for your loved one.

Heres How:

1 Chose a photo or message to display when the puzzle is complete
adjust the image to your desired size
you can use a printer or simply draw your design
2. Choose a mounting surface
-For a classic puzzle you may use wood (a saw is necessary so inquire at your local
hardware store
-Alternatively, foam board is a great choice. It is easy to draw on or mount your photo
3. Use dry adhesive spray or glue to mount your photo or image on the board
Glue sticks tend leave a less secure puzzle so use a spray adhesive and wait until it dries
completely
4. Finally, cut your puzzle. You can create jigsaw pieces or simple squares that must be
assembled to unlock your true love.

Good luck!

What do women really want

2010-06-21T08:46:00.000-07:00

Ok lets face it, anyone in military relationship has spent countless hours planning the perfect gifts for their deployed loved one. We scrap book and bake then package up our perfect little gifts. We appreciate the work that our loved ones do and their sacrifice to our country...BUT...sometimes its nice get a lil something in return. Something that says "I appreciate you packing up the house and doing the whole PCS yourself" or "thank you for handling a deployments worth of smelly diapers"

I don't mean another post card of Bahrain. I mean a real thoughtful (I knew before I left that I would miss our anniversary and I planned ahead) gift.

Many anniversaries come and go while they are away. The lucky ones get pre-arranged flowers or the occasional fruit basket. Some even get a phone call or skype message (I'm a submariners wife so this is like Christmas).

Many guys set up pre-arranged flower deliveries to come for those special occasions or just as a way to mark the time.

What is the best gift you have received from your loved one during deployment?